As I continue my personal journey into the depths of myself through better understanding of the various precepts of the Eastern traditions, I often get hit by truths which leave me short of breath. Most recently this happened while reading more about ahimsa in Deborah Adele’s book “The Yamas & Niyamas.”

This is the first time I’ve actually used the terms yama and niyama so I’ll explain briefly before getting to the quote. All of the Eastern traditions with roots to India have a code of behavior (or precepts) one must follow to attain enlightenment and reduce suffering, often expressed in terms of things we should and/or shouldn’t do. I pointed out a reference to the Zen precepts in Ahimsa: Peace is Not Non-Violence, but I’ve mostly been talking about ahimsa, which is actually part of the Vedic precepts found in the yamas and niyamas of the yogic tradition.

Whether Vedic, Buddhist, or Zen, the precepts always start with non-violence because that precept must be fully understood and applied before any of the other precepts can be appropriately understood and followed. So ahimsa is the first and fundamental precept of the yamas and niyamas, which are themselves the first two limbs of the 8-Fold Path of Astanga Yoga. The yamas are a set of five restraints – non-violence, non-lying, non-stealing, non-excess, and non-possessiveness, some of which we may discuss later – which result in freeing the compassion required to deepen our personal journeys and make possible the path into the niyamas: purity, contentment, self-discipline, self-study, and surrender.

Ahimsa (non-violence) is critical, though, for without it everything else comes undone. Think, for example, of the second yama of satya (non-lying or truthfulness): without a commitment to non-violence in action and thought, we might wield truthfulness as a weapon, causing suffering instead of preventing or relieving it. When we are committed to ahimsa, however, we learn how to use satya appropriately, telling truth where it needs be told in ways which reflect the compassion of the universe. That is why ahimsa is so critical, it pervades all else we do and we must often be very attentive to catch its subtle tones. Adele hit me with just such a subtle aspect of ahimsa with this quote from page 35:

Worry is [a] way violence gets masked as caring. Worry is a lack of faith in the other and cannot exist simultaneously with love. Either we have faith in the other person to do their best, or we don’t. Worry says I don’t trust you to do your life right. Worry comes from a place of arrogance that I know better what should be happening in your life. Worry says I don’t trust your journey, or your answers, or your timing. Worry is fear that hasn’t grown up yet; it is a misuse of our imagination. We both devalue and insult others when we worry about them.

I can hear your protests from here, but just think about it for a second and you will see what she means. First, I would edit her quote to be more appropriate by saying instead that worry cannot exist within a loving relationship. Now, think of a person you know who worries constantly about you. You probably are confident that person loves you, otherwise that worry would be a waste of everyone’s energy. Despite knowing they love you, you probably avoid contacting them in many situations because you don’t want to hear that person go on about how worried they are for you (that is, how you’ve done things wrong and will continue doing them wrong for the foreseeable future). When you are having a crisis you probably don’t go to them immediately because you don’t want to hear “I told you so.” Essentially, you cannot commit completely to a loving, trusting, sharing relationship with that person because you cannot abide their worrying.

So friends, as we embrace ahimsa let’s stop our worrying. That doesn’t mean we stop caring, or that we stop helping (where help is asked for, not forcing it as that is an action of a worried mind): it simply means that we learn to trust the ones we love, and that we recognize that their paths are not our own.

Om Shanti

Advertisement